Friday, November 11, 2016

I am at a NEW place on the web now

Follow me please?

Drop by my new spot on the Interwebs... 

Thank you!

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Monday, June 20, 2016

Orlando and Today's Media

It's been over a week since the senseless shooting at an Orlando nightclub. I'm honestly still trying to comprehend how this happened.

Basically, I'm wanting to know why this is a logical conclusion for the shooter.

News reports say he claimed allegiance to ISIS. His father says he was disturbed at the site of two men kissing. Was this just a case of a religious man trying to kill off people? Reports also indicate the shooter had been to the Pulse nightclub in Orlando on multiple occasions. And, that he'd gone on dating apps to talk with men. Could this be just a closeted young man, angry at the world because he is struggling with his religion and sexuality? Having grown up in the south, it's not surprising to hear of a guy getting angry about homosexuals and then years later, learning they were just closeted.

Whether it's ISIS or being closeted, neither justifies going on a rampage with an AR-15 in a nightclub where people were just having fun.

It's been awful to hear the stories of the people killed in this tragedy. It's awful to consider these people were killed for some twisted soul's agenda.

It's awful that in the wake of this tragedy, people don't seem to want to make a significant change. Instead, they take to the airwaves, the Twitters or Facebook, and note the sadness of the tragedy but no one can take their guns away because it's their right. America.

Well. Yes, it's your right to have a gun. Absolutely. But? It's also a right to live peacefully and not get blown away by an AR-15. .... Speaking of that AR-15. The shooter had been on a terror watch list. How did he get access to purchase that assault rifle? No. Really. How?

And, then you have Republican Presidential nominee Donald Trump. Hours after the shooting, Trump congratulated himself on twitter for getting it right that the shooter was an Islamic extremist. Good on you, Donald. Good on you. Trump went on to say that had people been armed, this wouldn't have happened. And border control. That wall needs to go up. Right Donald. That wall is going to help with people already living here that are angry for no good reason. Right.

It's a frustrating time we are living in.

When you are angry, going out and buying an AR-15 assault rifle is not the answer. While that's never going to happen, there are always other options for anger. Talk it out with a friend. Breathe or meditate. Listen to music. Go for a walk.

There are so many options.

What do you think? Is this tragedy going to lead to significant change? 

ps: I promise to not always be so political. This is an election season and quite the time we are living in so, expect some discussion! I will keep it light, too! Promise! 
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Monday, June 6, 2016

When Anxiety Meets Confidence, Oh The Bad Things

So, yes. Yes, I have been away for a while. I would apologize but you see. It's really been out of my control.

That's what happens when anxiety strikes. You're rolling along. All confident and what not. Writing stuff and feeling great about it. And then...

Something happens.

It can be anything really. Hearing a co-worker complain about her life. Then all of a sudden, you internalize what she is saying. You are overcome with a sweat and dry mouth. In the middle of winter. You begin to remember how you feel about things. Sure. Life is good. But it could always be better. You have a masters degree, what are you doing at that job anyway. ... Because you suck. That's why. You're just ... I'm not even going to continue.

And then. You remember. You actually kick a lot of ass. Yes. You have a masters degree. But. The economy is still in a shit tank and you have bills to pay. And? While you hate the job you have, you aren't bad at it and you do help people. That matters for something. You have your health, you have wonderful family and friends. It's going to all work-out.

And, it kind of goes around in a little vicious circle. A negative comment from someone you thought was a friend, could send you into an absolute spiral. Too many rainy days? Yeah. Bye. Too much negativity. Being around someone I really don't like or that makes me uncomfortable as fuck? Being in TOO new a situation? Yeah. Really anything sets it off.

It sucks. BAD.

Thankfully there is medication. Ha! And most importantly, for me there has always been writing. You see, you would say talking it out probably. But. I get flustered trying to express myself through words a lot. It comes out scattered. Yeah. It's bad! You'd probably be ok with it, though. You'd understand. Maybe. But. I'd be uncomfortable so!

So. It's even worse when you feel like shit about your writing. Especially when it's been your outlet since you were 16. I first began writing around that age. It was an incredible outlet. Everything I was feeling? I could write it out and feel a gagillion times better. I enjoyed it so much, I even made it journalism my major in college. I was actually really good at it. Worked at a couple of local newspapers. Won awards. I felt like I made a difference. And then, I ran across some folks who really tore my confidence down. It was never my writing that was criticized. It was always something else. Mostly, a woman in the newspaper industry. And I could never really get over the criticism. So. I moved on. Got that masters degree in public administration all on my own. Hoping to make a difference with writing grants. But. ... That's the hardest area to get into that you'd ever believe.

So. Here I am. Always looking for opportunities where I could use that MPA or that journalism degree. Sticking it out with an interesting job that is incredibly frustrating at times. Because paying the bills is important and one of these days - It will get better. And I have to remain confident in that. Otherwise? Well!

Basically, I have been dealing with a lot in my headspace and couldn't really communicate. And I feared that if I did communicate it - I would come off dumb and pathetic. You would wonder about me and if I really should be writing.

And honestly, that's something I have to learn, and relearn, not to worry about.

That will forever be something I am working on. In addition to dealing with my confidence. Dealing with my anxiety.

Anxiety is a topic I will discuss again! It's something I live with and I know many of you do, too.

It's always nice to know you aren't alone.  
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Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Micoblog Monday - Order What?

Today's Microblog Monday topic just floored me. Why? Because I can't even!

Would you ever let someone choose what you’re going to eat at a restaurant?

Absolutely not!

First off, it's mostly because I am too picky for words. I don't like certain foods mainly because I just don't like the thought of eating it. Or the texture doesn't appeal to me. And then there are flavors that I've tried and won't try again. Or just don't want to try.

Secondly. And this is probably obvious. I'm a control freak.

The very thought of someone else picking what I eat is almost more than I can handle.

Sure, you'll probably get it right. If I am in this situation with you, you'll more than likely know this about me. You'll know what I like and what I find gross. You'll know what textures and flavors repulse me. There are maybe a handful of people I'd let pick what I eat at a restaurant. And there are some that I would get up and walk out if I had to let them choose.

See? This just isn't an ideal situation for control freaks! Oh my goodness!
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Friday, January 22, 2016

Friday Drinks #1

My apologies for not writing much lately. Work's been crazy. Life has been hectic. So, let's sit and chat over coffee or beers or whatever!

* One thing I did make a little time for was a binge session for the hot documentary on Netflix, Making a Murderer. This show was mindblowing. I can't tell you if Steven Avery killed Teresa Halbach or not. But I was floored by the determined way in which the Manitowoc County Sheriff's Office went after him. They wanted to get him for whatever they could. And that Brendan Dassey hasn't received a new trial is criminal. He was completely disserved by possibly the worst public defender in history in Len Kachinsky. I could go on and on, and if you want to discuss feel free to send me a message. I have many an opinion on this one! And, if you haven't watched the documentary. Do so.

* I had said one of my goals for 2016 was to start working out. Well, I did join the gym and have begun working out. I'd honestly missed that more than I even imagined! Had a rough day at work? Go to the gym and work all my rage out before taking it out on anyone!

* Another goal was to sign up for a race. While it's not a road race, I have signed up for this: The 2016 Puppy Love Virtual Run - 5k/10k/Half Marathon
I signed up for the 5K because I am working my way up. And walking is welcome! It will be a nice challenge and benefits the American Humane Society. I really dig doggies and kitties too, so! Boom! I can run/walk this Feb. 13-21. I'll let you know!

* The BlogHer Writing Lab prompt this month have been reflecting on balance. ... I need to work on that! How about you? It's amazing to be in your 30s and not have it figured out yet. Oh well! Life is an adventure.

* Red Oaks on Amazon Prime is pretty amazing. The 80s. Tennis. Country clubs. Have you watched? Other Amazon shows you like?

* Very nice that winter decided to show up this week. Ice is the worst.

* Quick politics thought. Sarah Palin endorsing Donald Trump. Did you see his face when she rambled for 20 or more minutes in her opening speech!

This pretty much proves what a joke his candidacy is, but it should make the next few days before the Iowa Caucuses a little more entertaining. I also hope it means Tina Fey makes a return to Saturday Night Live this weekend. 

* Speaking of stuff to watch, this picture alone makes me want to catch 13 Hours. John Krasinski is looking good these days! Also makes me miss Jim and Pam from The Office! This is like an amped up Jim though! Look! 

 So tell me what's going on with you!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

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The sun washed over my face.
Warmth washes over me.
Looking down, I see the ocean water crashing against my legs.
The water is not deep at all but burries my feet in sand.

This is my first attempt at trying about Yeah! Enjoy and dive in if you want! 
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Friday, January 1, 2016

Happy New Year! Goals for 2016

Ok, first things first! 

Yeah, I made that. Thanks, Canva! ;)

I've never been really great at doing New Year resolutions. I'm more of a goal setter. So let's talk a little about my goals for 2016.

* Enjoy life. It's simple enough. But y'all, I get anxious and let silly stuff stress me out. Remembering to take the time to enjoy the little things ... friends and family, and getting to spend time with them and not take anything for granted. It's important.

* Get Healthy. I have been working on this one for a while. But I am going to take the step to join a gym, again, this year. A new one is opening here and has better hours (24/7) so, Why not! I also want to step up and do a race this year. Even if it is a virtual. Yeah, ok, I'll do a 5K and move up in distance from there. I have friends who do half marathons for funsies, so why not!

* Improve Diet. I've lowered my carb intake, began using Almond Milk, drinking more water, eating more fruits. I basically wanted to continue on the track I'm on and improve!

* Make this little place awesome! I want to make this a nice place where I can share my thoughts and talk with y'all! I have lots of ideas so we shall see what happens here.

* Work on my photography. I have a photojournalism degree. I enjoy taking pictures. It's incredibly relaxing and a nice form of expression. I want to do some more of it this year. Whether it's starting something big or just sell a few shots. We'll see!

* Improve myself financially. Nuff said.  Plans.

* Travel. This will happen easier when I improve myself financially. So. This is a hopeful goal!

So. That's it for now. I have a few other personal goals that I'll work on.

I hope you all have a wonderful, fun and successful 2016. All my love!

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